Tomorrow I graduate from my 200 hour yoga teacher training. It's exciting. And scary. And wonderful. And soul-shakingly terrible. All at the same time.
And I've been realizing lately, or seeing from first-hand experience, that that's how it is. Whenever something ends, the possibility for something else starts. Whenever you close a chapter of your life, you open another one. And, if your life is anything like mine, that new chapter will be pretty damned unexpected.
I'm trying to be at peace with it. I'm trying not to second-guess or judge or dismiss any of it. I'm trying to be present for each and every moment. But it never comes easily. The mind judges and projects and worries. The old shadows make their presence- damned persistent in spite of so many practices designed to settle them- known. The old patterns which seemed broken return.
But that's the the whole point of this lesson that I'm learning and re-learning and will undoubtedly learn again: there is no such thing as done. That truth, at times frightening and frustrating and maddening, is also the source of all this hope. The source of all these new beginnings.