Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Sick

So, you may have noticed, I already missed a day.  In defense of myself I will say that I DID write yesterday, I just didn't get the damned thing finished to post.  So I have been writing everyday, even in my illness.  Just not posting.

I have strep throat.  Or at least, I think I do.  I haven't officially heard back from the doctor about the lab test result from my throat swab.  But whatever I have is bad enough for the doctor to have started me on high dose amoxycillin right away and since I am feeling better today I gotta think it's working. 

Monday I didn't even think about going in to work.  Tuesday I went in and had enough coughing fits during the morning meeting that my boss said "You know, I think there's coverage available..." which I happily accepted and then went home again.  After 11 hours of sleep last night (sometimes it's good that every cold medicine known to man makes you drowsy) I'm feeling significantly better.

My coughing fits are not frequent.  My nose stopped running, for the most part.  My throat doesn't cause me agony every time I swallow (but it does cause my ears to pop, which is weird).  What isn't better is my brain.

It's like being in a fog.  I'm aware of some things, but I miss a heck of a lot more than I pick up.  I can't remember what I did one minute ago.  At work, I go into a folder looking for something and have no idea what I'm supposed to open.  Things are hazy and I'm detached.  Not quite out-of-body detached, but just detached.  Like there's a veil over everything.

Even my thoughts are hard to track.  I'm aware that my train of thought is going at the same rate it normally does, but I don't see every car.  It's like I'm standing on the side as the train passes and I only look up every now and again so I don't know what came before the thought or what connected it to the last one I was conscious of.  I struggle to complete simple tasks, finish simple sentences.

I tried an experiment yesterday.  I took my cold medicine, which makes me real spacey, and tried to write.  My thought being that maybe I'd have access to more crazy creativity because my thoughts would be unfiltered and my internal critic wouldn't be functional.  It didn't work.  I still wrote the way I normally do, but I kept having to go back and check the previous sentence cause I didn't remember it.  Then after half an hour it became hard to sit upright.  Thus why I didn't finish the post.

I'm not really sure what the point of this post was.  I guess just to let you all know that I'm still writing.  Or at least still trying to write.  I assume this post was weird and probably not what you were expecting, but oh well.  At least it's here.  At least I posted something today.

4 comments:

  1. I'm sorry to hear you've been sick. I hope you get back to being your normal self really soon! Illness can take over your life sometimes.

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  2. I think you need bed rest to recover fully, hope you feel better soon. It's so horrible to have that nastly flu virus.

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  3. Hope you feel better soon!

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