It wasn't my fault. I'm sure you hear that excuse all the time- like all the freakin' time. But in my case, it really wasn't. I mean, who the hell even uses getaway cars anymore? And who the hell would run into the back seat of Jetta if they were gonna use one? It's really just a simple case of mistaken identity. Wrong bank, wrong time, shouldn't have been sitting there with the engine on.
Why'd I drive? Well, that's simple- the guy had a gun. You see a ski-mask wearing man in your rear-view mirror screaming at you to drive while waving a semi-automatic around your cab and you freakin' drive. I didn't have time to think, I just had to gun it.
The cops? Yeah, I saw the lights and heard the sirens. Christ, did I hear those sirens- those things could make a whole damned neighborhood go deaf! But that just made the guy scream at me louder. "Turn right!" And "No- there! There!" And then he was cursing at me cause I didn't know where I was going. I couldn't think about anything other trying not to crash!
I thought I was havin' a heart attack! The guy screamin' at me, the car screechin'- Jettas aren't exactly known for their quiet rides, you know? And I was speedin' around corners and nearly t-boning a dozen cars while the guy in the back is up my ass with a freakin' machine gun and- huh?
Semi automatic, machine gun- what the hell difference does it make? Either way the thing'll shoot your face off! Besides, doesn't it say that in your report? Oh, right- you're the one askin' the questions, yeah.
What's that? Why was I waitin' there in the first place? Well, that's a longer story. What're you gonna tell me you got all the time in the world? Yeah, well- I don't. So unless you're gonna charge me with something I'm- huh? Aiding and abetting? What the- yeah?
Um... I'd like to call a lawyer.