So there’s a new idea bouncing around in my head that I am terribly fond of. Like, I want to start a long-term relationship with this idea. I want to buy this idea a fancy, candlelit dinner, impress it with my wit and charm so it’ll want to stick around for a while, sweep it off it’s feet and settle down with it.
The idea is that everything I will ever need in order to be a fully realized and/or enlightened individual is already in my possession and always has been. Furthermore, it is the concept that maybe all of my neuroses and self flagellation and my guilt reflex the size of Antarctica are not only part of who I am but that they are there by design. That this struggle is my pre-designed path.
A friend of mine pointed out that the characters that we tend to connect most with, that we root for the most fervently, are the ones with the greatest arc. That the more crap they have to go through, the more obstacles placed in their path from point A to point B, the more that they are forced to change, the more we love them. On the same token, perhaps my growing self love and capacity for growth not yet realized is due to all of these issues rather than in spite of them.
Now, this isn’t a new idea by any means- I’ve heard it before. But over and over again life makes the point that timing is everything. In order to be receptive, to really get it, it has to be the right time. I really hope this is the right time for this idea and me to start something.