Saturday, July 23, 2011


It was like falling in love, only backwards. The same sudden, impulsive reactions occurred. Except that now the things he had originally had an abrupt, strange attraction to inspired an oddly strong sense of revulsion in him.

The way she tapped her fingernail on her front teeth as she sat with a bemused expression now annoyed him beyond any reason. The way she hummed under her breath when she was making her coffee in the morning inspired a nearly overwhelming urge to snap out a warning to shut up. Even the light snore which he once thought adorable and endearing now sounded like nails on a chalk board.

It made no sense to him and the more deeply he thought about it the more irrational it became. He loved her, he was smitten with her, he was devoted to her. And yet as time passed he felt the feeling grow.

He tried talking himself out it but logic didn’t work on irrational impulses. He tried hating himself since it was obviously his fault. But that solution didn’t fit as it made him withdraw from her even further. He tried planned romance but found it nearly impossible to enjoy himself. And in the end he had yet another failed marriage under his belt.

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