I’ve discovered something worse than Christmas decorations at the very beginning of November: Christmas decorations at the end of February.
I have ranted in the past about how much I dislike the fact that Christmas dominates commercials, department store windows, mall decorations, radio stations and the like for the entirety of November in the past and have suggested legislation to prevent townships from putting up decorations and whatnot before December 1st. (Knowing no policy makers my protests have been ignored, but still.)
Well, all of those sparkly garlands on street lamps and wreaths on every door pale in comparison to the absolute travesty of a lawn full of Christmas decorations at the very end of February. January? Ok. I don’t LIKE it because we are in fact in a new year and should take notice of such, but I‘ll grant you a week to take everything down.
But the end of February? Are you F***ing kidding me? And don’t give me the excuse that it snowed and you needed to wait for the snow to melt to dig everything out and pack it away- you had those decorations up on the first of November, they’ve had their time! There is no excuse for leaving them out and then waiting for the snow to come and bury them. That’s just f***ing lazy!
There’s this one particular house I pass everyday on the way to/from work that- in the beginning of November- had a lawn filled (seriously, it looks like they bought out Walmart’s entire stock) with cheap, inflatable Christmas lawn ornaments. Back in November it looked tacky.
Now? Now I can honestly not think of any reason whatsoever why those people shouldn’t be shot. Seriously- the township fines you for not having proper trash removal, letting your backyard fill with too much stuff, not parking your car in a designated area. How can there be no fine for leaving a hundred deflated lawn ornaments in your yard in February? At that point the ridiculous odometer can’t measure the situation- it’s sick.
I have a solution, of course. But for reasons I’ll never understand homicide is deemed illegal no matter how much of a waste of space the shit head is. I disagree with this. I’m not saying you should make it easy (like as easy it is to get the weapon to kill the person- 3 days for a handgun?). No- you can make us fill out tons of paperwork, go through all the usual red tape, etc, etc. But if we’re wiling to do that and have a valid case? No reason homicide shouldn’t be allowed.
Stupid politicians never listen to me.